My Liver and its Total Disdain for me.

Looking back at last week.....i realized i drank entirely too much.

I think it was either Friday or Saturday morning (they all are kind of running together), I woke up and my shirt was soaked with sweat. I tried to drink as much water as I could, but damn.....I was hardcore dehydrated.

So here goes.

Dryspell starts now.

Well....it started on Monday......then it ended later that night when Jordan invited me to see Josh Kelley show at 12th & Porter. I took it easy. 3 beers. But, I still failed at my goal to not drink this week.

But since then, I've been drinking water and a couple of diet cokes. I'm a good boy.

But now it's been a few days, my system seems normal and I'm totally craving some Sierra Nevada Pale Ale. Dammit.

The big problem is that I'm bored and watching television and I've got nothing better to do all night than to hit up the grocery store, grab some brew, and watch my netflix movies. But I want to be able to make it a week without grabbing for grandpa's cough syrup.

I can tell you. It ain't happening. Oh well.....

At least I'm pretty sure that I won't get tanked, since I've got zero people to hang out with this weekend.....and very little $$.

Sweet Dreams, kiddies.

As if you didn't know....

Not that this will come as a shock to anyone who reads this: but I am officially an idiot.

Maybe I'm just having a streak of bad luck.....or maybe I was just too drunk all of last week to realize what was actually going on. But without mentioning the nitty gritty details, or any names.....let me put it in terms you should understand. I am a monumental idiot.

My trip home was awesome. I saw a lot of really great friends that I hadn't seen in a while and met a few new friends that were really great people! I drank entirely too much (also, not a shock for anyone reading this) and slept very little (slightly uncharacteristic for me).

I got to see a LSU Baseball game......GEAUX TIGERS!

I tagged along with my friends to a bachelor party for my buddy David. I got to see some naked women. I spent all of my money.

I got to play a gig with my best friends and a couple of amazing bands: Veara and Stand Up Citizens.

I got to play for my friends David and Lacey's wedding and see them begin their life together. I got sloppy drunk at the reception. And somehow Brian managed to convince the reception band that we should play. I was very against the idea at first, but I am thoroughly glad that I sucked it up and played, because it was a ton of fun!

I ended up at the Spanish Moon and for some terrible stroke of luck kept drinking. Bad idea. I apparently made inappropriate phone calls and sent inappropriate text messages. But, whatcha gonna do?

Driving back to Nashville with a banging hangover was a miserable experience, but I made it. So I'm here. That's the end of my tale.

None of this really explains why I'm an idiot......but trust me.....as if you didn't know.....I am an Idiot.

Glen Phillips Videos

I must apologize for the tardiness of this post.....but it's not like any of your were holding your breath for it. And if you were.....you're probably dead.

These are the Glen Phillips videos from last Tuesday night's show at 3rd & Lindsley.


"Windmills"





"Courage"



Okay. You'll have to forgive me for this one. Up until this point, he bantered between songs and chatted up the crowd. Oddly, this time he just launched into the tune. It was all I could do to pick up my camera, flip it to video mode and catch him in the middle of a verse. Enjoy.

"Walk On The Ocean"




I hope you've enjoyed my foray into videography. Take it easy.

Several Days That Haven't Sucked

Awwwwwww.......Yeah!

Okay, party people....here's your long awaited recap of my last four days. I know you've been dying for this, and I'm sorry that today took so long to finish, but it seems the normal progression to summarize my actions after they have resolved themselves.

Monday was a good day. I got to hang out with my friend Jordan and her roommate. We meandered around Vandy and ended up playing darts at a bar that had fantastic prices during happy hour! Needless to say, after all that time throwing darts in and around the garage door at Brandon's old place, I still blow at darts.

Tuesday was rocktastic! Glen Phillips played at a bar downtown, so Ray and I made sure we were there plenty early to get the best possible table. We ended up being the first two people even there to watch the show. I took some pictures and a few videos, which I will post:











Wednesday we met a great guy who builds AMAZING guitars!!! Fred Welker is a really interesting guy. He's a bit like Obi Wan Kenobi, but without a badass lightsaber.....and with a serious talent for building guitars! I was fortunate enough to play some incredible instruments including an archtop, a baritone acoustic and a few flattop acoustics. Unreal!


Today (thursday), we wandered around in Gruhn's Guitars for a bit. I ogled a few old Gibson acoustics and some really nice Gretsch Hollowbodies. Afterwards, we trekked to the Yazoo City Brewpub and sampled some tasty beverages.....



okay. so perhaps my life isn't all that exciting, but at least I've been playing guitars and drinking good beer!

Sketches Of Lincoln

I suppose this rant is overdue.

Here I am. Finally in Nashville. Drove in on Monday, unpacked, chilled out. crashed out a while after midnight or so. And when I wake up the next morning?

BAM!
I'm sick.

I hate getting sick. I hate being sick. I hate how long it takes to get well.....or to even feel "normal" again.

And is it just me, or when you blow your nose, do you catch yourself peeking at the results of your efforts? It's an odd habit, but I remember doing it since I was a kid. It's never as impressive as I'd hoped for. It's not like one day I'll magically blow out a green and yellow swirl of an Abraham Lincoln silhouette. It's always just going to be a mess in a Kleenex™. So why would I keep looking?

I apologize for the nature of the previous digression. It just happens that is what is on my mind. Or is it technically surrounding my mind? Irregardless, there is a lot of it up there, and it seems determined to escape through any oraface possible.

Ok. I promise that I'm done talking about my mucus infestation.

Other than that......it's cold.
How come every year I forget how cold it can get in the winter. Perhaps it's because I'm still not used to the weather above 30° latitude. It's been in the 20s all week so far. I know that I've been in colder weather before. Hell, I lived in colder weather last winter. But somehow, I'm still freezing my testicles off......not that you wanted to know.

Well.....I need to go eat something so i can take the crappy Tylenol Cold crap that I struggle to believe is working. Take it easy, people.

Sons-Of-Bitches

Those dirty bastards at Post Cereals have really chapped my hide.

They've done something horrible. Something that borders on pure evil. It's almost to the point that I can't even mention it.

But since you're reading this, I suppose I better make at least a mention of it.

They've changed 'Honey-Comb'. It doesn't taste right. It is no longer the sweet honey-tinged puffed rice cereal that I grew up with. It now tastes like feet.

Here's the crux of the situation. I was wandering around in the grocery store, which generally spells disaster anyway. I needed a few items. Mainly beer and toothpaste. But I just happened to wander down the cereals aisle and saw a Family-Sized box of one of my favorite cereals from my childhood. And a whopping Seventy-three cents off!

Sadly, now I know why the discount was applied.

Dammit.

Awww....Not Again

Well, I once again quote the immortal Whitesnake when I say:

"Here I go, again, on my own......" (duh nuh nah nah)

The answer is.....yeah. I'm moving again. I think I've got a good bead on it this time. So........

Nashville- here I come!!!!

Ray and Christine have been waaaaaaaaaaaaaay more-than-cool, and are letting me crash for a spell. I plan on finding a jobby-job and not being a total mooch.

Leaving Durham is somewhat of a mixed bag for me. I've had some really good times hanging out with 'Big C'. Plus, D-ham itself isn't all that bad. Hanging out at Tyler's and the Federal has allowed me to ogle several attractive women. Corey and I saved a few hundred bottlecaps from our late-night "music listening" sessions. We also managed to piss off a few neighbors here and there.

At the same time (and mostly on account of me being a lazy sack of crap), I've been bored out of my mind most of the time in the D. Granted, I've caught up on a loooooooooooooooooooooot of TV that I missed while I didn't have cable in the NYC. I could probably recite most of the episodes of 'NYPD Blue' or 'Aqua Teen Hunger Force', but that's not really furthering my goal.

I'm excited about Nash-vegas. Having driven around town for the last week or so, and having had a couple of in-depth conversations, I know that this is the right move.

I know that I at least have to give myself an honest shot at playing tunes. Living in BR wouldn't give me that opportunity. Living in NYC was a great experience, but the industry is so fragmented there. Durham, as far as I've seen, has zilch as far as opportunity.....unless you're into bio-technology (sorry, Big C).

The only drag is that after a solid six month stint in the Triangle, I finally see a beautiful girl. If anyone knows the really tall girl that works at Tyler's by the Bulls' ballpark, let her know that I'm only here for a few more weeks......'cause I was waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too much of a wuss to tell her that tonight. She was tall (which is attractive and intimidating, all at once), brown hair, blue eyes. In the least, I was impressed! I was quite infatuated......so much so, that I got busted at least 7 times for staring. Awkward!!!

Ok. So, in case nothing is mentioned later about this:

WHO DAT?! WHO DAT?! WHO DAT SAY THEY GONNA BEAT 'DEM SAINTS?!?!?!?!!!!!!!!!!!

All the way, BABY!

Homeward Bound + Show

Howdy folks.
It's that time of year again.

The roads are filled with shoppers who are more concerned with finding a 'Furbie' or a 'Tickle-My-Nuts Elmo' than they are with how awful their driving is. The spirit of the season is more based in consumerism than cheer.

It's also the time of year that I make my now annual trip home to Baton Rouge to see my family, my friends, and my dog. I plan on spending a fair amount of time on the inside of several bars. My goal is to enjoy life, slightly or incredibly inebriated.

It's also the second year in a row that I have a show around Christmas.

Northgate Tavern. Saturday December 23rd. 10pm.

David Loti will open the show with a full band, and I'll play with my guys after that.

Much respect to Tom Poirier who is pulling double duty, playing drums for both David and me.

Also, JT$ is pretty studly for playing with his band, The Lazarus Heart, earlier in the evening and then hauling ass across town to thrown down on bass with yours truly.

I hope to see a lot of you while I'm home, both at the show and in various haunts around the Red Stick.

Rock on.
-cpk.

Okay...I get it.

Ha ha ha....very funny.

My inbox has been filled with email most of the day. And by filled, I mean that I've gotten five emails today......and by today I mean this week. But it actually did all show up today. Strangely enough, it was all relevant to one particular topic.

Poor, poor T-Bizzle.

It's actually quite sad that five people felt compelled to send me articles about Taco Bell. I get it....I eat Taco Bell. I like it. It's relatively cheap, even though it has been years since the prized "59-79-99" menu was in it's prime. You could feed an entire village of poor, starving, mosquito-bitten African children for a total of $7.46......then again, I could just eat it myself. Seriously, what kind of American would I be if I didn't do my part to add to the stereotype that we're all fat self-concerned slobs.

I truly am sorry that people in the greater New York area have gotten ill from eating at a Taco Bell restaurant.

My question is this: What makes you bastards so special?

No really. Do you know how many people get sick from eating at Taco Bell everyday? You think you're so great 'cause the Escherichia coli gave you a different type of diarrhea? My dad used to get what seemed like 'Montezuma's Revenge' everytime I made him take me on a run for the border.

Would Taco Bell be owned and operated by Yum Brands, Inc if the food wasn't absolutely delicious? I doubt it. You don't hear of any companies called 'Our Food is Fucking Disgusting and Bad For You, LLC'! That's because they would have a very hard time selling anything.....even something as awesome as a "Choco Taco". Trust me.

Jonathan and I have a very special friendship that has only been strengthened by our love of fake mexican food. I'll always remember the summer of 1998.....and the stomach problems that resulted from it. If my memory serves me correctly, it was eight straight days that I ate Taco Bell, three times a day. Breakfast was usually around 1pm, Lunch at 8pm, and Dinner was eaten closer to midnight. I spent the ninth day in the bathroom for several, relatively obvious reasons.

On a different note, I am quite glad that Taco Bell no longer employs that grubby Chihuahua that 'quiero'd' TB......no, not tuberculosis. I always thought it was most likely against health regulations to have a mangy dog wandering around the food prep area. That's got to be some sort of health code violation. Then again, an E. coli outbreak is probably due to some lapse in cleanliness.

I've done some research and decided against explaining in any detail the cause of E. coli outbreaks......mostly because it is absolutely disgusting and totally involves dookie.

I suppose I should be appreciative for those five people caring so much about my intestinal fortitude that they forwarded the article above. That was quite nice of you. The funny thing is that the more I received the article, the more I craved Taco Bell. Is that wrong?

I hope not......'cause dinner was awesome!!! And it only cost me $7.46!

Facial Hair and You!

Hello kiddies.

Do you remember those old kid's games with a goofy, almost clown-ish face encased in plastic with small, magnetized particles that you could move around into shapes on the poor sap's dome?

No?

How about now.....Wooly Willy!!!

Ok.....so here's where you come in.

I'm lazy.               Shocking revelation, I know.

As previously mentioned, for Halloween, I shaved my previously grown facial scruff into a kick-ass "HELL YEAH!" beard. And although I'm still waiting to be able to bring you all the most-excellent picture of said beard....I (again) have laxed into a period of 'in-between-ness'. My scruff is going on 8 days old and I have yet to decide what pattern it needs to take for the next few weeks. So, I figured it'd be fun(ny) to see who actually pays any attention to me at all and what he or she has to say about my scruff.

So take a look at the options below and decide what hair makes the cut........I'll pause for a moment and allow you to laugh your collective asses off at my hilariously intended pun.

.

.

.

You good? Rock.

Choice A. (the standard "A Chris in Winter")

Choice B. (the "Tuxedo")

Choice C. (the "Chops & Dot")

Choice D. (the "Imperial")

 

Okay. So there it is. The one with the most votes wins and will be shaven.....unless I think it's stupid by the time I decide to crack out the razor. Just for giggles, let's say voting ends by Wednesday.....evening.